Words by Jordan Willis
Jordan writes in the third person. When not watching British comedy, he’s trying to write his own series to fit the ethos. In order to not be too happy, he too is working on an anthology series of books and short films about monsters dealing with the lows of life.
Illustration by Lily Hawkins
Lily is a communication designer. She loves publication and web design as much as she loves black clothes, black coffee and her pet rabbit Jerry.
I think the writers of the new Jurassic World film were taking the piss. The rough plot follows bad guys taking dinosaurs (original and self-created) and selling them for millions of dollars. I believe the actual quote was ‘We’ll keep making them, and they’ll keep buying them.’ As I sat in IMAX with my giant popcorn, what annoyed me the most was that they got me. Again! How many times can you get away with CGI dinosaurs eating people, with a guarantee that they’ll make millions?
I’m not against sequels. Within 24 hours of its release, I had seen Incredibles 2 twice. What I am against is riding on the coattails of nostalgia and putting little effort into the story. I don’t want to see the same thing. If I did, I’d watch the original. I want the story continued and built on in an intelligent way. But not everyone does. Or they think they don’t. When someone’s childhood characters grow, the audience complains. When they’re presented as the same (*cough*Solo*cough*) people are bored. What do we want? To be appeased or challenged?
The newest addition to Twin Peaks was amazing. David Lynch built on from the original two seasons and gave us something completely different and fresh, but of course it was met with a number of complaints. It wasn’t the same show it once was. I’m sorry, but if you started watching with the expectation that you were about to discover every unanswered question, well that’s on you. It’s David Lynch… And it’s the same with Star Wars. If you want Luke Skywalker saving the day, that movie has already been made. Go stream it online. And if I want to see a Dinosaur theme park reach its inevitable high human-count destruction, well, I now have too many watered-down options to choose from.
Nostalgia makes its millions because people want to revisit beloved characters. A somewhat where-are-they-now. Jeff Goldblum was the star of the Jurassic World sequel trailer but is in the actual film for two minutes, looking bored and giving a speech poorly written speech. I’m surprised the writers didn’t have him do it shirtless for some unexplained reason just for that further nod to say ‘we know you like the original, so here it is again.’
I might be overreacting—it is, after all, my fault I went. And I’ll probably see the next one with the faintest glimmer of hope that I’ll be pleasantly surprised. I doubt it, but it could happen. It’s a collective fault that this keeps happening. Look at Lucasfilm; no one saw Solo and, because of that, the company is rethinking its entire spin-off future. We did it; maybe from now, we won’t just get rehashed shit.
Don’t get caught up in buying nostalgia. Don’t write it either unless you’ve got a flippin’ good idea that builds on the story. If the next film is pitched as Jurassic Park meets Back to the Future, I may have to give up on my passion for cinema. Or maybe I’ll just turn to my unwavering love of Pixar. Incredibles 2 really was incredible.
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